Has it ever occurred to you that your most challenging problems may be the blessing you have been praying for? This is the wisdom inherent in the problem paradox.
If we could have it our way, most of us would choose never to have huge seemingly insurmountable problems. Their impact on our lives can be disastrously negative, causing physical health ailments, psychological challenges like low self-esteem and a desire to stay away from others. But why do we always react so negatively to problems?
Yes, going through difficulties is not pleasant. However, how often have you looked back and said, “I am glad I had to go through that. It transformed me into the better version of myself.” The question is, “Why did you react so negatively to something that was there to benefit you?” Perhaps that is a natural part of being human. You squirm when you get a medical injection meant to improve your health.
Here is a lesson so often missed. The problem paradox logic says challenges are there to serve you. “What service do they provide?” you may ask. The primary function of problems is to reflect to you what is not working well or not working at all. Problems are a mirror that reflects your position relative to the goal you’re working towards. They show you what is not working at the moment. What they’re saying to you is this, “To get there, you need to change your approach or direction.”
Your binary options.
That presents you with two simple options: ignore the feedback and continue to do business as usual or heed the warning and look for better ways to achieve the goal. If your choice is the latter, you may have to interrogate your assumptions. Many of our failures are the result of beliefs that are based on a lie. As the Belief – Action Spiral diagram below indicates, your actions are the practical expressions of your beliefs. Put differently, you do something because you believe it will move you closer to what you desire.
Problems are your loyal servant whose primary job is to give you honest feedback about how aligned your actions are with universal principles. If they are, your actions will lead to successful outcomes. If not, they will fail. In that sense, they are there to serve you.
They are that constant feedback loop that tells you how well the process is unfolding. They’re like the warning light on your car dashboard. It presents you with a choice. First, ignore the warning and continue driving. Second, stop and attend to the problem immediately. That may involve seeking advice from an expert on how to proceed. Alarmingly, many people choose to continue and hope for the best. The problem with that strategy is that the longer it takes before something goes wrong, the longer you take to attend to the underlying problem. The inevitable consequence is a catastrophic failure at some point.
How often do you trudge on with poor eating habits that you know will lead to lifestyle diseases like cancer and diabetes? That is, you ignore the gentle warnings, the minor problems, that this path is leading you in the wrong direction. You opt to disconnect the warning light on the dashboard, so to speak, as opposed to fixing the problem. In doing so, you’re missing out on the potential problem paradox blessing.
In his blockbuster book Good to Great, Jim Collins talks about a military process called After Action Review. After every mission, the team sits down and itemizes what worked well and what did not. They use these insights to further refine the process by doing more of what works and cutting down on what doesn’t. They understand the underlying benefit of the problem paradox.
Here’s a problem paradox challenge to you.
Are you ready to do your own After Action Review? Let’s start with your top three most important goals? Take out a spreadsheet and list the common problems you have faced. Go as far back as you can. After all, these are important goals whose breakthrough can turn your life around. Now look at what your approach was to each of those problem warnings. Remember, a problem is like that warning light on the car dashboard. Did you stop and ask what it was that they showed you were doing wrong? Of course, not all problems are because you are doing something wrong but when there is a pattern of failure, it points to you needing to accept that what you’re doing is not working.
One famous example from the Bible is the life of Joseph. As a young boy he had dreams of being a leader that his family would bow down to. That was the promise and the goal. However, for the next twenty years or so he endured betrayal, slavery and imprisonment before rising to become the second most powerful leader in Egypt. The problems sculpted him into the person he needed to become in order to ascend that throne. He arrived there not despite his relentless problems. He got there because of those problems. The problem paradox message says, if you avoid the challenges brought your way, you’re simultaneously rejecting the blessings they contain.
Joseph’s resilience and unwavering faith ultimately led him to prosperity. His journey exemplifies how obstacles can be a blessing if you look at them the right way and learn the lessons they bring. That allows them to serve as catalysts for growth and success. That’s the lesson of the problem paradox.
What are your financial problems telling to you?
Let’s look at a problem many can relate to. Pinky finds herself with a major financial problem. She spent the last few years buying stuff on credit because she wanted to portray to her social media followers that she was well off. Then she received a letter from the bank that they were going to repossess her two cars. This was not the first such demand and she had ignored them all. What made this one different was because her identity was now tightly woven with her material possessions. If the news of her loss were to get out, the facade she had built would come tumbling down.
Pinky’s mother sat her down, again, and gave her a reality check. She showed how her failure to learn from her past problems had created her current situation. She continued, “This pattern of behavior will ruin your life. It’s about time you mustered the courage to confront your problems. Till when are you going to keep running away from them? Stop pretending that they don’t exist. This crisis is an opportunity to do things differently.” She said it could be a turning point but only if she was prepared to do the hard work required to face the reality of the situation and confront it head on. It was all up to her.
Turning a problem into a blessing.
As you may have noticed, the blessings and opportunities contained in the problem paradox need work to be realized. They do not just happen automatically. The problem is the wrapping you need to systematically remove in order to expose the blessing inside. Throwing the package because you’re not ready to deal with the problem means you’re concomitantly discarding the opportunity they contain. How many of your goals have gone down the drain this way?
Eventually, Pinky had a change of heart. “It occurred to me that I had been living a lie. And frankly, it had become difficult and expensive to keep up with it,” she said.
The first issue to address was her set of beliefs. “I realized that I spent more time and money pretending to be wealthy. It was more important for me to appear wealthy to my social media colleagues than to actually be wealthy,” she said.
To unmask the blessing inherent is a problem, you have to ask the question, “What is the lesson here?” It is easier to see the lesson in a pattern or if you seek feedback from people you trust. Awareness is just the first step. You also need to understand the underlying faulty belief and then replace it with its productive equivalent. That is what Pinky did when she decided to focus on working towards actually being wealthy as opposed to spending her money giving the appearance of wealth.
The next step is to follow the roadmap towards maturing your identity. Excellence is tied to identity maturity. Whatever goal you want to achieve, you start out as a novice and an amateur. As you become better at execution you transform into a professional. Given a choice, you would rather be represented in court by an experienced lawyer than one who just graduated. Why? In theory, the experienced one is more of a professional and less of an amateur. She has learnt the power of the problem paradox logic even if she may not define it using those words.
How excellence and identity are tied together.
To be a great golfer who consistently shoots the best scores, you have to become a professional to whom scoring those scores comes with a lot less ease. Becoming is a process of maturing in identity. You start out as an amateur and do the work to become a professional. It is that transformative work of becoming that matures your identity.
There are five stages to becoming one who operates at the highest level.
- You become something legally first. It’s a decision that you make. A means test may be required.
- Know what the template is to become the best version of that identity.
- You make that template a part of your mindset. You think in terms of those principles.
- You practically act in accordance with that which you are legally (step 1).
- You fully mature in that identity at the end of the process.
This is the roadmap that Pinky had to follow in her quest to become financially free. She saw problems less as obstacles and more as servants who gave her unvarnished guidance. She periodically sat down and did her After Action Review. She accepted that problems would be her constant companions who were there to serve her but only if she learnt the lesson they presented. Taking their feedback seriously helped her to shorten her learning curve and reach her goals faster.
There are other benefits of facing the problem monster in the face and taking him on. These include giving you resilience, making you stronger, enhancing your creativity and learning to see differently.
Conclusion.
The next time you face a seemingly insurmountable obstacle, remember the problem paradox. Don’t be afraid to stare the “monster” in the eye. It might just be the catalyst for your greatest triumph. Embrace the challenge, learn from your experiences, and watch your problems pave the way for a brighter future, both financially and personally. There’s immense power in transforming problems from burdens into stepping stones, and the journey of overcoming them can be just as valuable as the destination.
As you navigate your own journey to financial freedom, remember that every obstacle you encounter is an opportunity in disguise. Embrace the Problem Paradox logic and watch as the toughest challenges transform into your greatest gifts, propelling you toward a future of abundance and prosperity.
Problems are your loyal servants who won’t lie to you. They are better than a mirror in that a mirror tells you the truth but you have to correct for lateral inversion. Lateral inversion is when your left is reflected as your right. Problems don’t have such a distortion. They lay bare the truth in its most unpalatable form. Either you accept it as is, face it head on or choose to play hide and seek and allow a problem to linger longer than is necessary.
Like Pinky, facing and conquering money problems can be a transformative journey that can lead to valuable financial lessons and personal growth. By approaching financial challenges with resilience, vulnerability, and a growth mindset, you can turn financial struggles into opportunities for financial empowerment and stability. Just as a diamond is formed under pressure, your financial challenges can shape you into a wiser, more financially savvy individual ready to embrace a brighter financial future.
The Problem Paradox reminds us that our greatest challenges have the potential to become our greatest gifts. By embracing adversity with resilience, gratitude, and stewardship, you can unlock hidden opportunities for growth and success.